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  • Writer's pictureAnnaGrace

The White People Will Eat You

On the night before our first day of teaching English in Thailand, our ministry host told us "some of the kids might be afraid of you."

Of course, we were totally taken aback. "What? Why?"

She said, "Parents use white people (westerners in general) to scare their children into doing things. They tell them that white people will eat them". 

So, apparently white people are absolutely terrifying. Now that we've been in the villages of Thailand doing house visits, we've realized that it's not just the children. The elderly community will barely look us in the eyes because they're so afraid of us. I guess I kind of get it...

So, my friend and Team Leader, Saraya, wrote a hilarious short story that I just had to share for your reading pleasure:

It was a dark and stormy night. 

Tommy has been sitting at the dinner table for the last three hours. 

His broccoli had been reheated at least four times.

But he would never eat it. 

Broccoli is gross. 

His mom had warned him over and over of what might happen if he didn't eat his

vegetables....but he was too old to believe in those stories. 

The legend told of a being that would creep around the houses of children who didn't eat vegetables. 

It was said that this creature was human in form, but pale and sickly looking.

Smelling of fried foods, with coffee stains on its American flag t-shirt, this terrifying ghoul had been said to devour Asian children who refused their healthy greens. 

But Tommy didn't believe it. 

Sneaking over to the trash can, he quietly threw his broccoli away.

"You ate all of it?" Tommy's mom later questioned. 

"Yes mom! I swear!"

Tommy climbed into bed, still trying to shake the silly stories out of his head when all of the

sudden, a shadow appeared on his wall. 

It was coming from the window. 

Tommy pulled the covers up over his head, telling himself that he was imagining it. 

It wasn't real.

It wasn't real.

The smell of french fries and caramel frappuchinos reached his nose. 

He could hear faint whisperings....



"I knew them beffforeee theyyy were coooooool"

"Vitamin seaaaaaa"

Tommy was frozen in bed... he couldn't move. 

Suddenly, his blanket was ripped from his bed and the nightmarish figure loomed over him. 

He barely has time to make out the leggings and Uggs before....

A bloodcurdling scream echoed through the neighborhood. 

Tommy was never seen again. 

The end.

Moral: Eat your kale, kids. We're gonna getcha.

With love from Nong Khai, Thailand


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